Fuck Blockbuster Part Deux

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By:  John The Violator

 Dear Blockbuster:

 I thought we were cool again.  I accepted the fact that I was going to be forced in to purchasing ”The Farce of the Penguins” from you.  My money must have been good because I know that the check that I wrote you posted to my account.

 I have just one question for you…. ”What in the fuck is your malfunction; you dying piece of shit! Are you fucking kidding me?”.     

I have no idea what you are talking about.  I will admit that I rented “The Number 23″, “300″, and “Grumpier Old Men”, but for the love of God, I didn’t return all three of the cases empty!  What is your beef with me?   I appreciate the fact that you had the balls to have a store employee call me regarding this matter.  To be quite honest I get tired of your automated phone calls, and bullshit emails telling me that my movies are late.  It means a lot to me that “Assistant to the Regional Manager” Aaron Jones took time out of his busy schedule to personally call me.  I am sure that Aaron had a shit load of DVD’s to alphabetize and there is always beverage coolers that need restocking so the fact that he called me and took time out of his schedule to accuse me of being a douche bag is all too kind. 

I want Aaron to know that I did go home, and yes Aaron “I looked under my couch!”. I didn’t find them there.  I didn’t find them behind the entertainment center, they weren’t in my bedroom, and although I am sure it happens all the fucking time, I didn’t throw them out with the garbage! 

If you want to know what I think, I think you took them home and are trying to set my ass up!  I know how much you like taking my hard earned dollars, but not this time…. No, it WILL NOT happen again! 

 You can take your scratched up DVD’s and stick them straight up your corporate machine of an ass!

 Fuck you! I’m out!

 John The Violator

 p.s. – You better pray that Krazy Karl doesn’t get a wild hair in his ass and decide to franchise.  If he does he is going to put you all out of business…….

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